Happy Thanksgiving!

Everyone enjoy your turkey day and while it may be tempting, don't eat TOO much. Or if you do at least pace yourself, you've got all day. Happy Thanksgiving! 

Black Men Rock! ...except on B.E.T.

Now, before I launch into a whole "thing" about this, let me state a couple of things for the record. I only point these things out because since voicing my opinion about certain things I've heard much of the following:

1. I am NOT a woman hater
2. I am NOT a man lover (at least not in the sense that I put a man's feelings above a woman's)
3. I DO NOT want to be a man.
4. I DO want to see both women and men recognized for their achievements.
5. I DO think black women (and men) need to see positive role models all the time.
6. I DO think that shows like Black Girls Rock are a good idea.

With all that established, if at some point you feel the need to disagree with what I'm saying, please be my guest. But don't attempt to come at me with any of the arguments I've already cleared up above. All I'm gonna do is point you in the up direction so you can get your bearings and come back with something else. Now...

This past Sunday, BET aired a program called Black Girls Rock. When I first heard about it, I have to admit, I liked the "campaign". I didn't know it was an actual show yet. The BFF and I were trying to watch Kanye West's Runaway, and an ad for Black Girl's Rock came up on the screen. The ad featured shirts and we liked the idea of rocking a "Black Girls Rock" tee. Because of course... we rock. I was generally on board with the concept of it. After learning more about the organization, I still think it's a great idea. Wasn't sure about how long it had been around, but I liked it.

Then I saw a commercial for it. Like... this is a show? That's coming on? Really?? Just months after that whole Nightline Face Off with Steve Harvey, Sherry Sheppard and Jacque Reid about the issues of successful black women? Where all the women were yes-ing the comments about not being able to find a good black man and how they deserve this and that (because in not so many words "they rock"). See: Black Marriage Negotiation. At a time when "For Colored Girls" is coming out? A movie where all but one of the men in the film is a complete shit hole? In the midst of almost every Tyler Perry movie portraying black men negatively? (Except for that one that made the LEAST money. Anybody remember the name of that one? I'll wait...)

Ok, don't get it twisted. I'm not saying there are NO fucked up black men out there and we should be singing the praises of those who don't deserve it. There are a hell of a lot of dudes, who mirror all the negative images of black men we see. There'd be nothing to draw from if there weren't. But my experience (and the experiences of most of the people I know) show there are way more good dudes out there, they just don't have the same press agent. My point, if you haven't gotten yet, is that if anybody NEEDS a little upliftment, kudos, accolades, pats on the back, and shout outs RIGHT NOW, its black boys/men. I'm NOT saying that "pushing women forward, pushes men back". I'm NOT saying that shows like this aren't necessary for young black women. There are lots of black girls who know they "rock" and so many more that don't, so I get why it's important. I was proud of some of the things that these women and young girls accomplished. I think they should be honored everyday. What I AM saying is, where's the "Black Men Rock" show? I've never seen one. Somebody please step in and correct me if you think I've missed one.

The timely appearance of Black Girls Rock and all it represents makes it painfully obvious that the same encouragement and upliftment is lacking on the other side. In a time where it seems the divide between black men and women is getting bigger, I just want to see us ALL be held up and praised for our accomplishments. Maybe it will help bring us back together. Please let me know if you see what I'm seeing. I'm hoping all my enlightened sistas out there can appreciate what I'm saying without thinking that I'm somehow NOT supporting us.

To all the brothas out there who feel like you're not appreciated for all you do, big AND small, if you're thinking "Where's my shout outs?"

...I just want to let you know YOU ROCK! (insert confetti and award ceremony music here)

Runaway and Other Artsy Fartsy Things (Actually, just Runaway)

Before I make comment 1 about this, you should really watch it. I promise, it's worth it.

Watch it here. Or you can get the big ole jumbotron experience here. I'll wait...

Awesome right!? Did you even watch it??

If you decided that you weren't going to see for yourself what all the hype was about and just wanna see what I thought instead, you suck. You'll be mad you missed it too. Sooo, I'll put another link at the bottom cuz I know you're going to want to see it.

Anyway, I LOVED it. Had to watch it a second time though because I fell asleep in the middle of it the first time...lol. Mr. West always knows how make people take notice. Yanno, do things a little differently. To his credit, I really didn't think he was this deep. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure this was totally publicity for his upcoming album and G.O.O.D. Fridays, but it still seemed like it was more than just that. Seemed like he had something to say. Visually, I was very impressed. The shots, the music, it ALL had me sucked in. So much so that I got a little emotional near the end when Phoenix was leaving. I have a renewed appreciation for him. He missed me with that 808s and Heartbreaks mess (which I heard I need to go back and listen to now that I've heard Drake's album).

Also, after finally hearing the G.O.O.D. Friday songs, Runaway looks like it shoulda been the video for Don't Look Down, which actually would have been a hot song to play at the end instead of Lost In the World (now my favorite song ever!!) No matter though, it was still the most interesting thing to come out of hip hop in a long time.

Stop playing yourself and go watch it.

RUNAWAY

Non-Black Person's Guide: What Is Natural Hair?

I'm a huge fan of YouTube and I'm always on there trying to learn new things. How to take care of my hair, how to do stuff, where to find crap, etc. As someone who's gone "natural" I find that it's been my biggest support system and the best place to find help when I need it. A few of the people I subscribe to are a part of the natural community and usually have good advice and recommendations for products and methods to try. However, I have yet to come across someone who's explained why natural hair is even such a big deal. I subscribe to this person's channel and here is her latest video explaining just that. Please check it out, it's very insightful and sheds some light on things that I'm sure even black people didn't realize.

Glamazini #226: Non-Black Person's Guide: What Is Natural Hair?

Real Quotes From Work

Co-worker: What's wrong with this tape? It's sticky.
Me: *blank stare* It's tape.

Be Incredible

It's that time of year, for me at least, when talk begins to turn toward which new communication portal I'm going to be committing myself to. That's right, it's "New Every Two" time! You Verizon peeps out there know what I'm talking about. You also know how important it is to pick the right cell phone. If you don't, you can't upgrade again for another two years. And let's be honest, as fancy as these new phones are, the prices they charge existing customers for them is effing ridiculous. C'mon, I love texting and talking and surfing the web, but do I want to pay you an additional $400 to do it? Eff you.

Anyway, my choice at this point is clear. Kinda. I can get the Incredible, which is everything it's cracked up to be from what I hear. iPhone shmi-phone! OR, I can wait. Til January. Why? Haven't you heard? The iPhone will be coming to Verizon (it's really true this time).

*Hmph*

*Confused face*

And the winner is...

drumroll please...

Before I tell you who won the "Naturalversary" Contest, lemme just say, I really enjoyed doing this. Believe it or not, it's a nice feeling to give something away to someone you know will enjoy it and who actually followed the contest rules...lol.

My "Naturalversary" Contest

Believe it or not in just a few days, it will be my 3 year natural anniversary. More preceisely, it's the date I got my last relaxer. Not sure if that's exactly where you count from when deciding, but that's the date I use. Since then it's been a journey of self discovery, trials and hair tribulations. Along the way I've tried braid outs, twist outs, braids, weaves and all manner of hair adornments to make my kinky-curly do something at least half way decent. My latest obsession is wigs. Half-wigs, full wigs, lace fronts... anything that I can plop on my head and pretend I'm Beyonce with is good for me. I'm also a sharer. If I've discovered something I'm having major success with, I want to share it with all who'll listen. Combine those two things and you have My 3 Year "Naturalversary" Contest.

My New Favorite Thing

When I saw this a few months ago while perusing one of my favorite blogs, I was open. As simple as it was, I had to have it. It summed up how I was feeling at that moment about certain things in my life. The message was simple, but for some reason it said so much. Couple that with my ever changing afro and you could almost call it an epiphany. "Brown Skin Lady" that's all it said. Set on a fun yellow tee, I felt like it'd been made especially for me.

Is truth something women REALLY want?

*sigh*

Before I answer this question, let me state for the record that this is my opinion based on my experiences. When I say "women" I am not talking about ALL women. If you don't fall into this category, then I'm not talking about you. I am however, talking about A LOT of women. Enough so that this is a fairly common thing.

The short answer is yes. And no. Confusing huh? Let me explain. We don't want to be lied to, but we don't always want the truth. For example: "Does this make me look fat?" The obvious answer here is "No." I hate to say it, but any other answer is just not going to work. Now, let's say that said outfit DOES make her look fat. You're NOT supposed to say that. It's messed up, but for the most part it's true. The ideal way to deal with this situation is to first say NO. Understand this... "No." is the correct answer. While it may not necessarily be the truth, hearing it IS NOT something that is going to go over well with the average woman. Only after you've said no will any other comments be heard and accepted.